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Desire and Despair

by Maceman

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1.
I'm That Man 04:19
On a cold cold November's Night Was a young man Under the light Didn't have no money Didn't have no food Just a brown paper bag Once filled with booze Came the warm warm Rains of July Still the young man Laid on his side Waiting for someone To open their heart To show him the way To make a new start I'm that Man I'm that man Who you behold Down on the ground In Times of sorrow When we all ask why Do we look down And then pass on by? I didn't ask for money I didn't want your food But who was my neighbor Through this solitude? I'm that Man I'm that man Who you behold Down on the ground
2.
Rode My Bike 02:42
Rode my bike Into town Left my bags On the ground And then i said goodbye to a world gone wrong So I'm writing this song I've done some things I must admit Just silly things I'm not proud of it So I'm stepping out I'm saying bye, bye, bye And I'm singing this song Rode my bike Past the city line Watched it burn As I looked behind And i said goodbye To a world gone wrong I'm writing this song
3.
Lonely Moon 04:00
HERE I AM ALONE AGAIN YES MY LIFE’S INCOMPLETE AND THE MOON-IT LAUGHS AT ME AND THE SUN-IT YELLS DEFEAT SO I WALK WITH MY HEAD IN MY HAND AND I LOOK FAR BEYOND STILL THE MOON-IT LAUGHS AT ME AND THE SUN- IT YELLS DEFEAT AND THE MOON… AND THE SUN… EVERY TIME AND TIME AGAIN I THINK OF MY PAST AND THE MOON-IT LAUGHS AT ME AND THE SUN-IT YELLS DEFEAT SO I BUILD MY BRIDGES STRONG AND I KEEP WALKING ON AND THE MOON-IT LAUGHS AT ME AND THE SUN-IT YELLS DEFEAT
4.
FIRE IN THE MORNING FIRE IN THE NIGHT IT'S DARK HERE IN THE SHALLOW PARTS IT'S DARK HERE IN THE LIGHT HERE I'VE SEEN A RIVER FLOW BEYOND AN OPEN WALL AND IN MY DREAMS WHAT'S BEEN CARESSED IS NOONES FAULT AT ALL. RAINFALL IN THE MORNING RAINFALL IN THE NIGHT IT'S WET HERE IN THE SHALLOW PARTS WITHOUT THE GUIDING LIGHT HERE I'VE SEEN A CHILD FALL A THOUSAND STORIES TALL AND IN MY DREAMS WHAT'S BEEN CARESSED IS NOONES FAULT AT ALL
5.
I may not be able to Say the words you need me to When you need it But I know deep in my heart And I knew it from the start That I do When you say those words that hurt me so Can you blame me? We may not see eye to eye You may even start to cry when you need to Try to do the best I can And you still don’t understand when I do When you say those words that hurt me so Can you blame me? For feeling the way I do? For writing this song to you? It’s only a love song When the road seems dark ahead You can always rest your head on my shoulder Just a word and I’ll be there With a smile to show I care cause I do When you say those words that hurt me so Can you blame me? For feeling the way I do? For writing this song to you? It’s only a love song For feeling the way I do? For writing this song to you? It’s only a love song
6.
Sad Sad Song 03:42
Babe, I never thought I'd see you leave We’ve grown far apart I guess I’ll just be lonely {yeahhhha} Our lives together was such a special thing I thought you were mine forever I’m so lonely Now that you’re gone I guess I’ll write you this sad sad song I was so wrong That why I’m writing you this sad sad song Our moment together was such a special thing If I thought it would work You know I’d do it again I’m so lonely I'll keep the memory deep inside my heart It was such a shame that we had to part I’m so lonely Now that you’re gone I guess I’ll write you this sad sad song I was so wrong That why I’m writing you this sad sad song It was so wrong That why I’m writing you this sad sad song It was so wrong That why I’m writing you this sad sad song
7.
Movin' On 03:12
Don’t Blame Me Yes I lit the Fire But the fire – it’s gone. You Can’t Turn your head from the flame But I’m moving on. Ohhho How you sit in your chair And you sit and you stare Writing books until dawn But I’m Moving on. Don’t Blame Me Yes, I told you the truth But the truth was too long made you hide. Open your eyes And then you’ll see the pain If you look past those lies. Ohhho How you sit in your chair And you sit and you stare Writing books until dawn But I’m Moving on. Don’t Blame Me Yes I lit the Fire But the fire – it’s gone. You Can’t Turn your head from the flame But I’m moving on. Ohhho How you sit in your chair And you sit and you stare Writing books until dawn But I’m Moving on
8.
You tell me I’m the one You want to stay Been searching oh so long And now you feel okay But let me make things clear So you will see The man you say you want Is full of uncertainty But how can I love you When I can’t even love myself Believe me I’m trying But I’m filled with so much doubt Look away babe if you can Keep moving on So much for you to see Be clearer when I’m gone The clouds won’t last all day Wind pushes through Revealing sunny ways And clearer skies of blue
9.
High School 04:14
I am so lost You know I am lost without you I am so lost You know I am lost without you I am so lost You know I am lost without you I am so lost You know I am lost without you I travel alone It’s a lighter load Then I’m used to today. ‘cause I’ve been hurt too many times And I won’t get hurt again. You see, I’ve learned through hard experience Not everybody’s playing fair So I go about my own business Without even splitting hairs Reminds me of high school And the silly crushes we had We thought were real You said your love was forever No, it wouldn’t fade to gray And now there’s a hole where I had my soul Since you took your love away It’s not that I don’t miss the loving And all the funny times we’ve shared Walking winter’s blows just to bring you a rose Just so you’d know that I cared I guess you can say I’ve grown bitter Or grown accustomed to the pain ‘cause I’ve walked this road so many times Out in the pouring rain Reminds me of high school And the silly crushes we had We thought were real You said your love was forever No, it wouldn’t fade to gray And now there’s a hole where I had my soul Since you took your love away I am so lost You know I am lost without you I am so lost You know I am lost without you I am so lost You know I am lost without you I am so lost You know I am lost without you Reminds me of high school And the silly crushes we had We thought were real You said your love was forever No, it wouldn’t fade to gray And now there’s a hole where I had my soul Since you took your love away And now there’s a hole Where I once had my soul Since you took your love Since you took your love away
10.
The Strain 03:15
WHEN I FEEL THE STRAIN… I WRAP MYSELF INTO A BALL IT… IT HIDES THE PAIN… AND WHEN I FEEL THE COLD… I RUN FOR SHELTER BEHIND THE SWELTERING… AND WINDY LOAD… AND IT SEEMS THAT ALL MY LIFE I’VE BEEN WRONGED I CAN’T ESCAPE WHAT I’VE LONGED AND ALL MY LIFE I’VE BEEN WRONGED… I NEED TO FEEL YOU CLOSE… ‘CAUSE NEXT TO NOTHING THERE’S ALWAYS SOMETHING… THAT MEANS THE MOST… AND ALL MY DAYS HAVE GROWN LONGER BUT IT MAKES ME FEEL STRONGER YES ALL MY DAYS ARE SO LONG… OH ALL MY DAYS HAVE GROWN LONGER BUT IT MAKES ME FEEL STRONGER I CAN’T ESCAPE WHAT I’VE LONGED… I NEED TO FEEL YOU CLOSE… ‘CAUSE NEXT TO NOTHING THERE’S ALWAYS SOMETHING… THAT MEANS THE MOST… BUT I CAN’T ESCAPE WHAT I’VE LONGED… WHEN I FEEL THE STRAIN… I WRAP MYSELF INTO A BALL IT… IT HIDES THE PAIN…
11.
I wish you could feel Just how I feel If you would see Through these eyes that bleed The yearning to learn The meaning of worth Yet here I remain The Last Man on Earth I wish you could find The meaning of time We’re vapors today The next gone away The more that I think No more can I sink Because of this curse The Last Man on Earth When People Stand on others Just to get ahead What is it For? Will they want more? I wish you could feel Just how I feel Yet here I remain The Last Man on Earth I wish you could feel Just how I feel Yet here I remain The Last Man on Earth
12.
CRAZY AS IT MAY SEEM I WOULD GO OUT ON A WHIM TO SEE THE COLOURS FADING IN TO THE SEA FUNNY WHAT I WOULD KNOW SEND MY MESSAGE TO THE WEAK UNTIL CAPACITY PEAKS TO THE FULL AND I HAD A DREAM… FLOATING… DOWN… STREAM… AND I HAD A THOUGHT… I WAS SOLD AND BOUGHT… CRAZY AS IT MAY SEEM I WOULD CLIMB OUT ON A LIMB TO SEE THE COLOURS FADING IN TO THE SEA
13.
IT WAS A BEAUTIFUL DAY SO I DECIDED TO WALK WITH NO DIRECTION IN MIND I HEADED SOUTH ON THE BLOCK SAW THE POOR WITH THEIR HANDS OUT COLLECTING NOTHING BUT DUST THE LOCOMOTION COMMOTION AND THE SCREECH OF A BUS I REMEMBERED ALL THE PLACES I WOULD FREQUENTLY PASS NOT TWO YEARS AGO BOARDS WHERE THERE WAS GLASS NO MORE RECORD STORES, HEADSHOPS, CLOTHING OR SHOES JUST A MASS OF WANDERING SOULS WITH NOTHING TO DO…. NO LIGHTS AROUND US ONLY BLACKNESS AND GREY BUT WHEN I LEFT THIS MORNING IT WAS A BEAUTIFUL DAY AND ALL THE FOGS HAVE MEDDLED AND SETTLED BUT HEY WHEN I LEFT THIS MORNING IT WAS A BEAUTIFUL… DAYLIGHT BREAKS INTO MY WINDOW AT DAWN SO I GOT UP AND I TREMBLED LIKE FIRST STEPS OF A FAWN THE AIR AROUND WAS THICKER WITH THE SHOUTS OF DEBATE 'CAUSE THE STREETS WERE ALL FILLED UP WITH VIOLENCE AND HATE SO I LIT MY CANDLE IN A FLASH I WAS GONE NO MORE NOISE POLLUTION RAINING THICK ON MY LAWN I FINALLY REACHED THE PREACHED THE END OF MY GOAL AND WITH OPEN ARMS I WAS SWALLOWED UP WHOLE… NO LIGHTS AROUND US ONLY BLACKNESS AND GREY BUT WHEN I LEFT THIS MORNING IT WAS A BEAUTIFUL DAY AND ALL THE FOGS HAVE MEDDLED AND SETTLED BUT HEY WHEN I LEFT THIS MORNING IT WAS A BEAUTIFUL DAY NO LIGHTS AROUND US ONLY BLACKNESS AND GREY WHEN I LEFT THIS MORNING IT WAS A BEAUTIFUL DAY AND ALL THE FOGS HAVE MEDDLED AND SETTLED BUT HEY WHEN I LEFT THIS MORNING IT WAS A BEAUTIFUL….. DAY YOU CAN RUN RIGHT THROUGH YOU CAN WAIT & MEDITATE BUT NEVER CAN YOU PRETEND… (NEVER CAN YOU PRETEND) YOU CAN HOP RIGHT BY YOU CAN EVEN TRY TO HIDE BUT THE PROBLEM'S STILL THERE IN THE END YOU CAN RUN RIGHT THROUGH YOU CAN WAIT & MEDITATE BUT NEVER CAN YOU PRETEND… (NEVER CAN YOU PRETEND) YOU CAN HOP RIGHT BY YOU CAN EVEN TRY TO HIDE BUT THE PROBLEM… IS STILL THERE… IN THE END NO LIGHTS AROUND US ONLY BLACKNESS AND GREY BUT WHEN I LEFT THIS MORNING IT WAS A BEAUTIFUL DAY AND ALL THE FOGS HAVE MEDDLED AND SETTLED BUT HEY WHEN I LEFT THIS MORNING IT WAS A BEAUTIFUL DAY NO LIGHTS AROUND US ONLY BLACKNESS AND GREY WHEN I LEFT THIS MORNING IT WAS A BEAUTIFUL DAY AND ALL THE FOGS HAVE MEDDLED AND SETTLED BUT HEY WHEN I LEFT THIS MORNING IT WAS A BEAUTIFUL DAY… A BEAUTIFUL DAY… IT WAS A BEAUTIFUL DAY… A BEAUTIFUL DAY…

about

This album represents some beautiful homegrown folk-rock.

credits

released August 21, 2008

All songs arranged, recorded , produced and played by Maceman except where otherwise noted.

Highschool and The Strain recorded at Grant Ave Studios, Hamilton, Ontario.
John Lewis - Lead Guitars ; Bob Doidge - Bass and Mellotron; Lisa Winn - Background Vocals
Drums - Tony Vlacic

Beautiful Day recorded at Mainway Studios, Burlington, Ontario.
Steve Hogg - Bass; Kevin Briggs - Lead Guitars
Atilla Turi - Drums

Movin’ On and How Can I love You
James Ryce - Vocals
Steve Nylander - Additional Pianos

Can You Blame Me
James Ryce- Background Vocals

Sad Sad Song
James Ryce- Background Vocals
Bill Mecca- Saxophone

I’m that Man
James Ryce- Drums, Bass
Bill Mecca- Saxophone; Steve Morton- Keyboard

All other songs recorded at my home studio in Hamilton, Ontario.
Cover Photos by Irene Suchocki (irene-suchocki.pixels.com)

Member of SOCAN & Neilson Broadcast Data Systems.

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Maceman Hamilton, Ontario

Homegrown Indie Folk-Rock

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